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Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Let's Make Decisions and Determine Validity Based on Our Feelings. Oh Wait... Let's Don't

Here's a list of fake feelings I've experienced in the last five months.
Mental:
-The feeling that I'm not fully awake
-The feeling that I can't tell if I'm awake or asleep
-Fear of wearing sunglasses (because they distort reality a little)
-Forgetting how to swallow on command
-Fear of yawning for too long
-Fear of getting a thought stuck in my head forever
-The feeling that my surroundings are foggy and unreal
-The perception that my limbs don't belong to me.
-The sense that my eyes won't focus on what I'm looking at
-The feeling that, no matter what position I'm in, my right side won't relax.
-Fear that thinking about my legs will cause a charlie-horse
-Fear that I will cause myself to go schizophrenic
-A sudden perception that every one of my senses is being overstimulated
-Fear of too much sensation
-Fear of a lack of sensation, too. (Numbness)
-A loss of joy in being touched
-The inability to decipher between sensations
-The sense that when I get the idea of panicking in my head for long enough, it starts to happen
-Fear of being out of control of my body
(Actual danger of any of these things happening? None.)

Physical:
-Extreme discomfort as my waste system functions properly
-Extreme discomfort in my feet when I contemplate certain textures
-Intermittent heart stabs, sometimes as a response to heat
-Persistent achy heart pain
-A feeling that there's an itch inside my chest that I can't scratch
-A lump in my throat that won't go away
-Pressure all over my head
-Tightness in my neck and throat.
-A buzzing sensation in my stomach
-A sense that the air is hot and cold at the same time
-A buzzing feeling on the bottom-middle of my right foot
-An overstimulated burn all over my skin
(Actual physical health problems? None.)

So, what about that burning in my chest during testimony meeting that I experienced so strongly that it forced tears out of my eyes?

...What about it?

1 comment:

Laura said...

Julia, you're such a cute little weirdo. This list of feelings is both amusing and horrifying.